不辜负人际关系

With the intent of staying no more than five years, I started work at Waynflete in the fall of 1991.  我和比尔·班尼特(Bill Bennett)谈论学校时，对韦恩弗里特产生了兴趣, 然后是长期任职的校长.  他和我都参加了一个教育领导力博士课程, and I noticed how he viewed virtually everything about school through the lens of the student experience.  I became curious: Can a school that truly prioritizes the experience of students actually function?  缅因州的波特兰真的有吗?  是什么特殊的成分使它起作用?

去年秋天, 二十多年后，在新一任校长上任之初, 我决定试着找出bet365官网经历的不同之处.  作为高中主任，我把注意力集中在我最熟悉的部门.  I surveyed ten current faculty members who were teaching in the 上学校 when I arrived and asked them to what extent they agreed with my assessment that while much had changed, “there is something fundamental in the current 上学校 experience that was not only present when I arrived in 1991 but was then and is now integral to the the 上学校 identity and success.”

每一位接受调查的教员都全心全意地同意这一说法.  当被要求描述他们所看到的区别成分时, 他们都提到了学生和成年人之间相互尊重和信任的关系.  正如一位受访者所说, “There was and is a warmth and trust that is extended to all students that creates an environment of acceptance and being known – mixed in with some good silliness and high expectations.  一个让学生(和教师)做自己的环境.”

经历过bet365官网的人都不会对他们的反应感到惊讶.  事实上, 实际上，每一个来过这里的人，哪怕只是短暂的拜访，都会注意到他们之间关系的强度.  在他最近出版的书中关于韦恩弗莱特的章节中, 《学校教bet365官网的宗教生活,丹·海施曼写道, “这么多年来，我访问过很多学校, 我很少看到学生像在韦恩弗莱特这样广泛地利用老师.  健康y relationships between adults and students in the community are a given at this school” (34).

但是，尽管关系文化可能会使韦恩弗里特的经历与众不同, 它在什么方面是学校成功的组成部分?  为学生创造一个强大的，改变生活的bet365官网环境是bet365官网的首要目标.  考虑到这一点，学生和成年人之间的关系实际上是如何重要的?

作为两个孩子的父母他们从三岁起就在韦恩弗莱特上学, I highly valued knowing that they were growing up in a community in which they knew and were known by non-parental adults.  在一个按年龄隔离学生的教育体系中, I saw the cross generational connections as crucial to their healthy development as they sought to “live up” to relationships with adults about whom they care.  Lydia Maier has been the Dean of 上学校 Students for the past decade and has now moved into an all-school role as Dean of Student Affairs.  她曾就读于韦恩弗莱特高中，她是这样描述“辜负”现象的:

“I arrived on campus preoccupied with finding my way around each unique building and very quickly shifted my energy to deciphering each individual teacher. I’d never had an adult ask me to sit down to ‘talk about my essay;’ I didn’t even know what an ‘essay’ was.  Here was Michele Lettiere walking me through paragraph structure and use of the ‘green’ metaphor in Lord of the Flies, 然后让我告诉她哪一段对我最重要.  在那一刻, 不仅仅是她富有启发性的解释, I was inspired by realizing that this new teacher of mine clearly believed that I could produce a point of view, 它将值得在世界上发声.  I would ask her a question and she would reply in a manner that I would soon become used to at Waynflete: ‘Good question.  你觉得呢??’”

Alums and their parents report countless examples like Lydia’s of how “living up” to relationships with adults at school inspires our students to do and be more, whether by taking the risk at the suggestion of an advisor to apply to a special program or by revising an essay one more time to get it right before submitting it to a respected teacher.

有意义的关系促进bet365官网的力量的证据不仅仅是轶事.  它植根于科学.  在他的书中, “大脑规则,” molecular biologist John Medina asserts that “there is surprising empirical evidence” to support the notion “that our ability to learn has deep roots in relationships” (45).  在他的新书《头脑风暴》中，M.D. describes how teen brains are hardwired for risk-taking; suppressed dopamine levels in the brain mean a higher threshold of challenge and novelty required to activate the teen brain’s reward system, 这是激励和成长的关键组成部分.  Risk-taking is a critical evolutionary task if teens are to acquire new competencies and eventually become independent (and confident) enough to leave home.  Relationships provide a key component of what is needed to manage the stress that accompanies such risk-taking and the the constant demands of school.

在她去年春天的心理学课上, 莉迪亚让她的学生探索成长和bet365官网的关系根源的科学:

“我的学生描绘了神经心理学家里克·汉森的‘红脑’概念, green brain’- observing how frequently they found themselves in each brain state- with “red brain” being a reactive mode that diverts the brain’s resources away from its potential for self-expression and self-soothing.  He refers to that all too frequent anxious state as one of ‘chronic inner homelessness’ that actually cuts off the brain’s access to its own higher level thinking and creativity.  汉森,Ph值.D, is a Senior Fellow at the Greater Good Science center where extensive research is being compiled on the brain’s capacity for expressing kindness, 同理心, 还有敬畏——这些特质是bet365官网更敏感的“绿色大脑”状态的特征.  This research underscores the notion that time spent connecting with calm and caring teachers reinforces the same circuitry through which our highest learning occurs- a win-win situation for stressed teens.”

此外, 关系文化的力量对教师和学生都是相互激励的.  Being allowed into the lives of our students and their families makes working at Waynflete infinitely varied and stimulating.  It is a cherished privilege that the faculty honors constantly by striving to deepen and enrich the experience of our students, 正如比尔·班尼特20多年前所描述的那样.  The fact that I have stayed at Waynflete nearly five times longer than intended (and counting) as a member of an unusually long serving and notably dedicated faculty is testament to the power of relationships to inspire all those involved to “live up” to the opportunities they afford.  Our relationships demand that we give our best each day; neither the faculty nor the students at Waynflete would want it another way.